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June 2012

“Human interconnectedness is one of the most powerful healing forces we have at our disposal:  – Andrew Weil

Numerous studies have established that support group participation during a cancer experience can benefit people diagnosed with cancer as well as family and friends who are also affected.  The National Cancer Institute states:

“Support groups can have many benefits.  Even thought a lot of people receive support from friends and family, the number one reason they join a support group is to be with others who have had similar cancer experiences.  Some research shows that joining a support group improves quality of life and enhances survival.”

The Mayo Clinic lists some of the benefits of participating in support groups as:

Feeling less lonely, isolated or judges

Gaining a sense of empowerment and control

Improved coping skills and adjustment

An opportunity to talk openly and honestly about your feelings

Reduction in distress, depression or anxiety

A clearer understanding of what to expect with your situation

Learning about new medical research

Getting practical advice or information about treatment options

Comparing notes about resources, such as doctors and alternative options

Wellness House offers several types of weekly and monthly support groups to help you to find one you feel could be good for you.  Please click Programs Support & Networking on this website for group descriptions and times.  For more information please contact Michael Williams, PsD, at 630-654-5117. 

There are some specific questions that commonly arise for children when they learn that a parent or other significant adult has cancer.  If you introduce this information as part of the dialogue with your kids, it may go a long way toward calming their unspoken fears.

First, when children are young, they often believe that their thoughts or actions can magically cause events that are not under their control.  It is important that children understand that they are not to blame for another person’s illness.  Even if they misbehaved or were angry with a parent, nothing that a child thought or did could cause someone’s cancer.  

In addition, it is important that children know that cancer is not contagious.  No one can “catch“ cancer like they can catch a cold or the chicken pox from a classmate or a sibling.  So it’s okay to be close to and to cuddle with a person who has cancer. 

Lastly, let children know the steps you will take to maintain their routine and who will be there to help them.  They need to know how they will get to their activities, and who will be taking care of them if mom or dad is in the hospital.  A serious illness in the family can be a disruption, but need not interfere with childrens’ overall sense of security.  Preparing them for the changes in their world will help ease the way.

Remember to keep your children in the loop when it comes to communicating about your illness.  As a result, they will be able to maintain and even grow in their sense of trust toward significant adults in their life.